Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

When I read that quote the first image that pops in my head is that of a woman whose hubby/partner has in someway done something to wrong her (I'm quick!). And the first wrong that pops in my head is the wrong of her man's infidelity - dunno why it's that one but I don't think I'm alone with thinking that way.

The thing is that while that is probably one of the bigger wrongs that a man can do to his woman.....it's by far not the only one. There are heaps! I know because 1) I am a woman and 2) I stayed up all night filling up my note book with a list of 100's.......1000's!!

So boys....you'd do well to remember that with women, it's not just the big things that count! Ohhhh-nooooo! The little things count just as much!

What do I mean by little things? So glad you asked.


Come between a woman and her chocolate when she is menstruating and be prepared to face a scorning woman for at least a week - could be two weeks, depending on whether you ate the last square or not and whether you left the empty wrapper in the cupboard/fridge/next to the bed.

Tape over any important video tapes (Your wedding/childs first steps/cliff hanging episode of Desparate Housewives) and be prepared to face the scorning until she's damn well ready to forgive you - could be weeks/months/years!

Mess in the affairs of her kitchen....like ohhh....I dunno...have a clean out and throw away her prized recipe books, including the one that she has hand written all her favourite recipes in over the years - and here's a clue for you.......just walk straight into the bedroom and pack your bags. Do not....repeat after me.....DO NOT make eye contact. Do not try and explain why you did it. Just go.

'Cause man.....you are never gonna be forgiven for that and she will make it her life goal to make your days a living hell for the term of your natural life. Trust me on thatty!

My wonderful but somewhat misguided brother did just that. In the midst of some kitchen renovations recently, he decided to "help" and cleaned out some of the boxes my sister in-law had packed up. Sooo sooo tragic!

Because I love my brother dearly and because I know how evil a scorned woman can be in this kind of situation (almost as bad a wrong as dipping your wick in someone elses candle btw) I've decided to try and do something to try and help and hope that my good deed will somehow aleviate the life long pain I know awaits him.

My Mission? Contacting all my sister in-law's friends & relatives and asking for any copies of recipes they know they have given her and then putting it altogether into a brand new sparkley book for her.

I really-really-reallly hope that works - 'cause as understandable as it is that he now faces his days living with a scorned woman......he's a lovely bloke....and sure he may at times be a little bit eager with throwing away "her" things, his intention was good.

Wish me luck!!

9 Comments:

Blogger Candy Froggie said...

LMAO!

good luck, huh!!!!

(thinking it's not always fun to be a man ;-) hehe

Wednesday, January 25, 2006 4:46:00 PM  
Blogger Mean Maude said...

Oh! Dear Oh! Dear Oh! Dear

*runs and grabs my rolling pin in her defence*

When when when? will men learn to just sit stay be quiet and only say YES Dear when spoken too?

I do have an old Granny recipes for honey comb she might need some of that to make her happy again.

Hugs (today the not so Mean Maude) :oD

Thursday, January 26, 2006 3:10:00 PM  
Blogger Jack said...

I have the scratches to prove your words ...

Thursday, January 26, 2006 7:32:00 PM  
Anonymous Jenny said...

Oh dear... I do hope your brother comes to his senses and manages to collect those recipes aagin !

Thursday, January 26, 2006 7:35:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Its a MAN thing

Friday, January 27, 2006 6:50:00 PM  
Blogger Miz P said...

Candles: I'm absdolutely convinced that there is no way I'd ever wanna be a man - being a goil is too much fun!;-)hehe.

Maudie: Just between you and me - I feel a bit sorry for blokes sometimes. They're damned if they do and they're damned if they do (not a typo hehe). But shhhh...that's just between us goils ;-)/

Jack: Scratches?? Oooooh - do tell....it sounds like Mrs Jack has a technique the rest of us goils could do with knowing! heheh

Jenny: It's too late to save the recipe books, they're gathering mould at the bottom of the rubbish tip by now *sigh*.

Anonymous I realise it's a MAN thing - you wouldn't catch a WOMAN throwing out another WOMAN's recipe books! ;-)

Friday, January 27, 2006 7:34:00 PM  
Blogger Candy Froggie said...

knock knock
nobody's around?!
I'll come back later, and i'll bring some fine bottle...should be tempting enough :P

Wednesday, February 08, 2006 9:09:00 PM  
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Saturday, May 29, 2010 3:10:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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Saturday, December 25, 2010 11:22:00 AM  

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